Restoration is what I need

Someone to scrape and chip 'til I bleed. I love this album! This week I took a much-needed rest from it all. But to be honest, I found it much harder to truly rest and restore.

Not sure if this happens to anyone else but you decide to take time off only to find yourself coming up with tasks to keep yourself busy. Can you believe that?! 

Here I am blessed to afford to take a week off work and I'm finding ways to keep myself busy!!!  Oh well, guess that's one of those ironies of life. 

These past few months have been full of changes. Some good some not so good either way I've had a hard time adjusting to it all and this week I have been able to catch up with myself, and boy, have I been operating on E for a minute. 

Though I was unable to let myself be a full couch potato it felt great to be able to spend some time doing nothing. 

Sometimes you need time to restore yourself! 

Soon I will be free...

 Freedom we might all know the definition but I'm not sure if we can truly comprehend the meaning. Yesterday morning, as I drove to work tears, started to roll as I thought about all the places my eyes have been able to see, and all the experiences I've lived. 

My immediate reaction was to tear up, I've been blessed so much and now I get to work to improve people's quality of life. 

I love how music can truly help you connect at times. There is no better feeling than to know that life is a canvas and if allow yourself to dream you can reach places you've never even dreamed about. 

Sometimes we forget that that is freedom. The ability to see one's life as a canvas and that we can create and recreate on our canvas as we like. So, go out there and create your canvas the best representation of what freedom means to you.

Happiness hit her...

 like a train on a track!!! It's funny how we go on through life creating our reality without even realizing how much power we have. I've spent most of my life believing that my choices have been influenced by the cards life dealt me or the choices others have taken. And though there is truth to my previous statement today I realize how much power I've all along to create my reality.

Life is never easy but depending on the lens you decide to use it can make it harder or easier for you.

I've never been happy till today. I don't mean happiness as the euphoric blissful state you're thinking, I mean the actual conscious state of feeling happy. Depression and anxiety can make you feel trapped but once you face those demons life starts to unfold.

So run fast my dears, run for yourself and your own pursue of happiness because it's right in front of you even in the darkest moments!

Let it go!

 This past weekend was not the most pleasant one. My entire being asked to take it easy and rest. While I was being a vegetable on my couch I started to realize how hard it is for me to let things go.

I mean I can seriously hold on to things so tight that I don't realize how much it's hurting me. After having so many diverse experiences in life you would think that I would have learned to let things go and move on. 

This week, I decided to learn to let go and move on more practically. No more holding on to anything tangible or intangible that doesn't help me grow!

So, started by cleaning my fridge!! (I hate cleaning the fridge!) But man did it feel good to throw out anything that no longer was good or was just sitting there.

Little by little I will master the art of letting go!

It's been a while since...

I can hear Aaron Lewis' voice as I think about this blog. It has been a while since I've sat down and started jotting down my thoughts. So many things have happened. But instead of trying to give an account of what's happened, I will fill in the gaps whenever needed. I mean it's only been seven years since I last wrote anything.

I believe I was still in China the last time I wrote a blog post. Well, now I'm back in Chicago I moved back in July 2017. Wow, how fast time goes by. It's been five years since I've been back. I can't believe it. I cried for so long and now I'm itching to leave again lol.

Sitting here today, I can't believe that I've basically completed my bachelor's degree and currently work as a research coordinator. 

I've spent time working through my trauma and even though it's a continuous process I feel like I have a better grip on things.

I got my sidekick (Akira!) She's a spoiled Shiba Inu diva that I would do anything for! I'm telling you so many changes have taken place and so many more are coming up?